If you’re like me, you know how challenging it can be when our kids want something right now—and waiting feels impossible for them. Whether I’m cooking dinner, on the phone, or helping another child, my neurodiverse kid doesn’t always understand the concept of “just a minute.”
But here’s what I’ve learned: Waiting is a skill. Just like learning to tie shoes or ride a bike, it can be taught step by step. And with practice, it becomes easier—not just for them, but for us too.
Start Small
When my child was younger, waiting even ten seconds felt like forever to her. So, we started with small moments:
- “Wait while I count to 5.”
- “I’ll give it to you after this song.”
This way, she could see there was an end to the waiting.
Use Visual Timers or Signals
Kids with neurodiverse brains often do better with something they can see rather than just being told to wait.
- A sand timer
- A countdown clock
- Even my phone timer with a little beep at the end
It helps them trust that the wait will end.
Offer Something During the Wait
I realized my daughter waited much better when I gave her something safe and engaging to do while she waited—like a sensory toy, a short puzzle, or even her favorite “string play.”
Praise the Effort
I always make sure to notice and say, “You did great waiting!”—because that reinforcement makes them want to try again next time.
Learning to wait without melting down is not just about patience—it’s about building self-control and emotional safety. When we teach this skill gently and consistently, we’re giving our kids a tool they’ll use for the rest of their lives.
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