I know how heart-wrenching it can feel when your child gets upset every time you leave. I’ve been there with my own child, and I want to share what’s helped us navigate separation anxiety.
Understanding It
For autistic children, separation anxiety isn’t just “being clingy.” It’s often tied to predictability, routine, and feeling safe. Even a short separation can feel overwhelming, and transitions can be really stressful.
What Helped Us
- Prepare in Advance
I started using visual schedules and social stories to show my child when I would leave and when I would return. Seeing it in pictures helped reduce worry. - Keep Goodbyes Quick
Long hugs or drawn-out goodbyes often made the anxiety worse. Now, we do a quick hug, a wave, and a cheerful “See you soon!” — then I leave confidently. - Comfort Objects
A small stuffed animal or blanket that smells like home became a security object. My child carries it to school or therapy, and it gives them a sense of comfort. - Predictable Routines
I created a consistent drop-off routine. Same steps, same words, same pattern. Over time, my child began to anticipate the routine, which helped reduce anxiety. - Celebrate Small Wins
Even staying in class for 5 minutes without tears was a victory. We praised small steps and gradually increased the time apart. - Stay Calm
I had to remind myself to stay calm and confident — my emotions directly affect my child. Showing confidence made them feel safe.
A Little Patience Goes a Long Way
Some days are harder than others. Separation anxiety doesn’t disappear overnight, but with patience, consistency, and small steps, children can learn to cope and even feel confident when you’re away.
💌 You’re not alone in this. Every child progresses at their own pace, and what matters most is love, patience, and support.
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