1. High Masking in Autism
- Masking means hiding or suppressing natural autistic behaviors (like stimming, avoiding eye contact, or speaking bluntly) to appear more “neurotypical.”
- High masking autistics often:
- Copy social behaviors they observe.
- Force themselves to make eye contact, smile, or use small talk.
- Work really hard to “blend in” so they aren’t judged or excluded.
👉 The problem: people assume they’re “fine” because they look like they’re socializing normally, but inside, masking is exhausting and stressful. It can lead to burnout, depression, or even being overlooked for support.
2. The Double Empathy Problem
- Traditional thinking says autistic people struggle with empathy and communication.
- The double empathy problem challenges that: The issue isn’t that autistic people “lack empathy” — it’s that autistic and non-autistic people have different communication styles.
So:
- Autistic people often understand each other very well.
- But when autistic and non-autistic people interact, miscommunication happens on both sides.
👉 Example: An autistic person may speak very directly (no small talk), which a non-autistic person might see as “rude.” Meanwhile, the autistic person might find the other person’s indirect hints confusing. Neither side is wrong — they just communicate differently.
3. Why High-Masking Autistics Are Misunderstood
- Because they mask so well, people think they don’t struggle socially.
- Their stress, effort, and exhaustion are invisible.
- Non-autistics may misinterpret their behavior (e.g., “they’re quiet, so they must be fine” or “they’re blunt, so they must be rude”).
- The double empathy problem means both sides walk away misunderstanding each other.
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